Memorial Day Weekend: Fun And Sun???...

A Perfectly Good Weekend Spent On The Couch....

Ahh. Some of yall get your minds out of the gutter. *hee hee* Last weekend, I had my whole weekend planned out. In fact, I arranged to have last Friday off from work to kick off things and to ease into the weekend. But Saturday a little scratchy throat turned into a bonafide sore throat, which announced that I had a cold. When I get a cold, I really want to know where and whom it came from. Could have been that nasty co-worker who refuses to wash his hands, or could it have come from the elevator button at work, or maybe on the shopping cart from the grocery store? Bummer. I didn't feel well and nobody feels like being around a coughing snott rag. So, there you have it. A perfectly good weekend gone awry. But I did read a couple of blogs where some of you had some really great plans. I just wished some of yall could have dropped a BBQ plate by my place. Nevermind. My tastebuds aren't back yet.

Oh well. I did the next best thing. I've been sleeping, drinking orange juice, and watching a lot of tv. And I've had enough tv and plan to return to work tomorrow. Let me tell you what I observed on the telly. But first let me take my hat off to honor stay-at-home moms, because daytime tv is pretty crappy.

Here's The RunDown:

The View -- I'm not one to gossip but, something is definitely going on at ABC network's show, "The View." Just as a recap, rumors have been circulating around about Star possibly leaving the show, because the show recently hired Rosie O'Donnell. Before landing the job to replace Meredith Vieira, Rosie made some unkind weight remarks about Star. I wonder about people who initiate attacks.

Well, when I was watching today, during their opening conversations I sort of noticed how Barbara Walters (Babs) wouldn't make much eye contact with Star. Joy Behar and Star also get into it from time to time, but it doesn't seem to be personal. But how else is Star to take Babs' (the Executive Producer) move to hire her arch rival? Stick a fork in her, because she is done. But the surprise may actually be that Joy and Rosie may be the ones to bump heads, because their of strongminded ways. On today's show, Star and Babs looked like two people who possibly had "some words" at one point or another. You know the look, right? When either one was speaking, they wouldn't look at each other, but they would have the "witch please" look on their faces. But I highly don't think witch would be their choice of word. I'm not gossiping or trying to signify. Honestly, I'm just saying. Uh huh. Plus, the NY Daily News has been speculating that Star and Al are going the way of Splitsville. I think a chunky sized meteor from outer space flying into the atmosphere would be more shocking. But I'm not sure this is true or not. Who knows?

Aside from that, I figured out what about Star, my soror, gets on my nerves. I really couldn't put my finger on it before. It's all about Star and no one else. There's a fine line between being outspoken and down right annoying. Believe me. I've tried to see Star's side, but she takes on this authoritative air. You know it when you hear when the person gets louder and louder as you try to get a word in edge wise. Since ole girl doesn't sing, dance, or act, she might want to pick up a law book and get back to her legal career gig, because Babs is showing us that she can be greasy (shady) like the bottom of a KFC bag. I like and respect Babs as a legendary newsperson, but she's gotten greasy, do you hear me? What can we say? Star is self-absorbed, somewhat annoying, but okay at other times. So, at least I can stand her, because I believe she does things to hide her insecurities and not out of meaness. And well, Rosie, she aint no prize. Hmph. I'm just saying.

The Lifetime Channel -- If you ever feel like life is treating you too well, or you want to be brought down a notch or two, or you are just a glutton for misery, try the Lifetime Channel. They have an unending supply of depressing movies. The only exception is the "Golden Girls" show from the 1980's. I'm not lying. Watch and see. And don't let a holiday roll around, because they will pull out the 5 Star depressing movies. On Mother's Day, they have movies about missing kids, on Father's Day, they have movies about absentee pops, and year-round they have movies about rape, murders, and kidnappings. Enough already and stop the madness!!!...

The Oxygen Channel -- With all the money Oprah has, why does her channel show the same movie three times in three days in these days of TiVo and other recording devices? Other than, I do like watching "Living Single." Plus, I found myself watching the Real Weddings show, which I had previously banned myself from watching. I didn't want to get all caught up in watching a bunch of Bridezillas going ape over their weddings. But I watched and saw some cute, love dovey weddings and then there were some crazy ones. I couldn't get over the Bridezilla who cursed out her parents before and after her wedding. For example, her mother made a mistake and stepped on her train or was holding it too tightly, and the bride called her mother an idiot. Another time, the wrong color flowers came to the house before the wedding. Her father tried to say everything would be okay, then she told him to shut up. The parents looked thoroughly embarrassed, but indeed they took it. I'm quite sure that the planning for weddings can be stressful, but you should have heard the nasty things that came out of the bride's mouth. But ultimately, I felt sorry for the groom who didn't have the heart or sense enough to take off running. Doesn't he realize that he'll be the target of his new wife's outbursts for the rest of their married lives?

The Food Network -- I really don't have anything deep to say about this channel. All I know is that I like it and it provides a sense of comfort to me. I wouldn't try to cook most of the things that the cooks make (especially those that appear to throw grass and leaves from the backyard in a bowl), but it's just comforting to see the cooks in their homes prepare meals. But the Food Network could stand to have a Black Soulfood Cooking show with the old time cooks.

M.SNBC (S.carborough Country) -- Tonight I found it quite odd that three white folks were discussing Oprah's rift with a few African American rappers. Apparently, they felt like "The Authorities" on the matter rather than the people actually involved. Was it too much to ask Oprah and the rappers to represent themselves? I guess that's too fair and balanced. I always find it highly amusing that shows like this one will feel confident enough to talk about a group of people, but will "not" include them as guests on the show. I guess they were afraid that the truth might leak out.

Did one of "The Authorities" become qualified to speak on such matters by having a dinner at Popeye's Chicken, or listening to a black radio station, or once wearing a jheri curl, or having black friends, or cocking their necks from side to side in an exaggerated sista mannerism, etc.? If so, that's still not the black experience and still makes them unqualified to part their lips on such matters. Whatever the case, my thing is let Oprah and the rappers hash out their differences in a manner uninterrupted by "The Authorities." But, heck-to-the-naw, tonight's trio thought they'd tell us black folks about ourselves. Now that's some of the highest level of strongfisted bullcrap around.

Good people, it's time for me to get ready for tomorrow. Although I have a cold, I highly doubt that my dandruff can be taken for sparkles at work. So I better go wash and dry my hair before it gets too late. I hope that everyone enjoyed the Memorial Day weekend and are settling back into work just fine. Oh and by the way, that green couch isn't mine. I just like the rich look of antique furniture.