Taking The High Road

Today, I deserved to receive an Academy Award for best actress in a workplace performance scene. What am I talking about? Well, let me take it from the tippy top. I've been working for a particular supervisor off and on for the better part of 10 years. I'm surprised that I was able to take it this long. This brotha boss (BB) of mine has been a trip at times. However, my job doesn't always travel on the edge of insanity most of the time, but there were other times. *sigh* Since I'm new to this blogging thang, I still wonder how much infomation I should divulge or not. Oh well. Let's get on with it.

To make a very long story worth 10 years short, I'll just cover the highlights. In the very beginning things seemed to be going well in my office. I felt like I had a fair chance of getting prime projects and promotions. I worked like a dog as project officer before even receiving my official project management training. But at the time I felt like that's what it took to rise to the top, since I'm not afraid of a little hard work. As a sidebar, I have to say that in my 20's I use to have a very idealistic, simplistic, and sunny approach to life. I use to believe that if you put the work and the time into a project that some kind of way you'd be compensated. I surely thought that my efforts would be recognized...

Well fastforward to my 30's and the ShortEndOfTheStickville. In my particular office, it turns out that a little plastic smile-giving, backstabbing, project-stealing, cakebaking, and some other jive brought on promotions. Well, Miss Zee aint bringing no poundcakes to work and aint showing no mouthy smile full of teeth to butter up nobody's biscuits. I take my work seriously and try to show a high level of integrity and professionalism. But I'm not fake about things either. Flatly, I have to say, what you see is what you get from me. Some at my job say that I need to be more of a teamplayer (laughing at the big boss' jokes, being extra perky no matter how early in the morning, always agreeing with the boss even if he suggests that the sky is lime green, etc.) Shux. And I say that some of those folks need to focus on the quality of their work more.

The above was just the average rubbish that many people face. But what really got me going is that I've been denied a major promotion for a significant amount of time. I've been given smaller ones, but I deserve the "biggun." I was still trying to give my supervisior the benefit of the doubt by questioning myself a few years ago until others started to take notice. Then this just confirmed that I was being done wrong. I only asked my boss once why I was being overlooked. And of course, he gave me some mealymouthed response, which didn't make sense. Through all of this frustration, I've remained quiet at work and kept calm even when the brother boss called me an angry black female in the office for others to hear. I simply looked away and continued on with my work. He's steadily hired new people who know little about our agency. But in the meantime and the between time, I've been the one that they call when an emergency arises or a congressional letter has to be written or when there is an angry voice on a phone disagreeing with our stance. But I seem to never be on anyone's mind when it comes to a promotion. Hmm. I think I heard in church or by way of some church folks that the first shall be last and the last shall be first. Well, if this is the case, I should be first the next time around.

Well, today he had his retirement party. Over the weekend, I went back and forth over whether I should attend. Honestly, I thought more about NOT attending. Afterall, he sure did earn the reason for me not to go. But my family and friends advised me to go and to be the bigger person and not hold a grudge. Say what? I really could have used a pity party with the cake, chips, and all, but the good people who are in my inner circle said that I would eventually feel better about attending. I'm waiting for that feeling, since I did show up for the party. One way or another I'm going to have to figure out how to take the highroad as a Christian, yet not be a lackey-yes woman. Although I was done wrong, I still wish my boss well in his retirement. ;-)

P.S. I still haven't finished that paper for the educational organization.

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Song of the Day:

"Ain't No Need To Worry" by the Winans. This song is dedicated to Ronald Winans who passed away last Friday, June 17, 2006, at the age of 48. Rest in peace.